May 17, 2010
A CASE OF THE MONDAYS
Its Monday! How was your weekend?! Wow that's really interesting. Anyway, now back to me and my weekend. I'm currently in a six pack abs/ weight loss competition with a group of friends so I thought it would be a smart idea to go to a party for each day of the weekend, and eat enough cake & ice cream to kill a small horse. On Saturday my daughter and I went to a birthday party for my friend's daughter. What kind of party was it you ask? It was a princess party complete with purple and pink tutus and tiaras. I thought I would be looking for excuses to leave within the first 5 minutes. Instead, we ended up staying for almost two hours. They booked the local pro, Princess Amerah. Despite my wife's false accusations that I have a crush on her, I will stick my neck out and say she did an amazing job and I'd recommend her to those like my brother Josh who will be in the princess party market for years to come, (he has three daughters all under the age of four).
*HBO's series "The Pacific" wrapped up its 10th and final episode last night. I can't describe in words how disappointed I was with the entire series. I know its not fair, but its hard not to compare it to one of the greatest mini series of all time "Band Of Brothers" (both were created by Tom Hanks and Steven Spielberg). If you have never seen "Band Of Brothers," first off, do not tell a human soul this piece of information, second, ask your nearest family member to jimmy kick you for this dire sin, and third, pawn whatever you can for money and go purchase it on DVD. Trust me, you will thank me later. To keep it brief, I would just say that "The Pacific" suffered from a massive lack of character development. I ask the same question my friend DJ asked me, "Is it too much to ask for a Dick Winters?" We do however get to see the same quality of action sequences and demonstrations of the true grit and effects of war. It just took way to long to get going. On the bright side, if you've ever wondered what happened to the little annoying kid from Jurassic Park, as seen in the advert above, it seems he is "all growns up" and has been killin' Nips in the pacific. Though the last three episodes were much better than the first seven, it just wasn't enough to save the series from itself. C+
*I also spent the weekend listening to Band Of Horses' new album which I'll probably end up reviewing at some point. Anyway, they are streaming it on their website as we speak so you can listen to it all you want for free... cheapskate.
*The Black Keys also have a new album coming out that you can also listen to. If you find yourself asking, "Who are Band Of Horses & The Black Keys?," shame on you. You should already own every album both of these bands have put out.
*If you are like me and didn't see Scorsesee's Shutter Island, it is currently playing at most dollar movies. It is also your last chance to see Avatar on the big screen. Nothing says high class like a date to the dollar movies. I recommend a stop off at the nearest dollar store just before, unless you like paying $17.50 for 4 oz. box of Jordan Almonds. The "stop & smuggle" is the only way to go. The only thing you should be buying at the movie theater is the overpriced, smooth-on-your-arteries, delicious popcorn.
*Apparently scientists have figured out the next step in the de-evolution from man back to ape. Have you seen the advertisements for this? Its called Nivea active 3. It's an all-in-one body wash, shampoo, & shaving cream. I guess they figured guys weren't lazy and negligent enough when it comes to our hygiene. How is this a good idea? I don't work in a salon or anything, but I don't think you should be washing your hair with the same thing you are using to clean your feet and under carriage. The next step is an all-in-one body wash, shampoo, shaving cream & toothpaste.
My favorite part is the ads they are using. Guys that would use this product not only don't have a wife to shower with, but they don't look like this guy. They look more like this fine group of single brothers:
and sometimes even this
and unfortunately this
*I also found out over the weekend that Real Salt Lake won the MLS cup last year, so I wanted to congratu... oh wait, that's right, I don't care.
*I do, however, care about my teeth. So much so that I am excited to see that Mountain Dew has three new trial flavors you can vote on here.
PS. Google the term "Mountain Dew Mouth" sometime. My wife tells me it is the distant cousin of "Meth Mouth," which is also worth your time to Google.